So in my last post I wondered what God was up to. Well I’m starting to figure a few things out, as best a human like me can.
Here is what stands out to me:
1- God is developing my patience. I am SO not a patient person. In high school I bought a poster because it said: “Patience is a virtue, but persistence to the point of success is a blessing.” Trust me, that was my motto. I even mentioned it to my mom when we were talking about my current job situation. She reminded me that God provided her with the right car at the right time (hers had broken down unexpectedly & she was without a car for a 1-2 months). My retort was, “But you have patience!” That’s when it hit me – God is developing my patience. He’s asking me not to jump at the first (job) opportunity, to not cross bridges until I come to them (worry about future scenarios that may not take place) and to trust that He has the best plan in mind for me. I don’t have to do it all on my own. I’m not alone.
2- God is also reminding me of His past fulfillment. God has always provided for me. When my dad was out of work in the winter (he was a plumber who worked in new housing developments that weren’t as plentiful in the winter), we always had food on the table and a roof over our heads. It may not have been ideal, but He always provided for our needs. But, like the Israellites, I easily forget all that God has done for me and worry about the future. [Exodus 14]
3- I need to rely and trust in Him. When the going gets tough, I don’t always turn to God. I often turn to idols, what I put in place of God. I put my self-reliance in the place of God and pretend I can make this all happen on my own. I put money on the throne of my life and pretend that all the money in the world will give keep me safe. The thing is — none of these things are certain, only God is. [Psst, if you think they are read the story of Job or check out Ecclesiastes]
To be honest, this has become a daily battle. I struggle with remembering what I’ve learned.