wyhr.orgWendy’s World

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. From now on you’ll be traveling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey.”
~Meg Cabot, but I heard it in The Princess Diaries

As per the recommendation of a friend, I’m reading Searching for God Knows What by Donald Miller. It took me a while to get in to it but I’m enjoying the author’s perspective on Christianity as a relationship and not a series of formulas and to do lists. Here’s a gem I uncovered last night:

“But here is Adam, the only perfect guy in the world, and he is going around wanting to be with somebody else, needing another person to fulfill a certain emptiness in his life.”

The author is referring to Genesis 2:18 & 20: “Then the LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.’ The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him.”

The author points out that we were created to be relational beings. We were made for relationships.

In chapter 10 of It’s Not About Me Max Lucado writes some excellent stuff on legalism. I realize not everyone uses that term on a daily basis so let’s look up the definition. Wikitionary defines legalism as “a philosophy of focusing on the text of written law to the exclusion of the intent of law, elevating strict adherence to law over justice, mercy and common sense”. Now here is what Max Lucado writes:

“Legalism discounts God and in the process makes a mess out of us.

Legalism is joyless because legalism is endless. There is always another class to attend, person to teach, mouth to feed. Inmates incarcerated in self-salvation find work but never joy. How could they? They never know when they are finished. Legalism leaches joy.

Grace, however, dispenses peace…’Gone are the exertions of law-keeping, gone the disciplines and asceticism of legalism, gone the anxiety that having done everything we might not have done enough. We reach the goal not by the stairs, but by the lift…’

Grace offers rest. Legalism never does. Then why do we embrace it? ‘Those who trust in themselves are foolish’ (Prov 28:26 NCV). Why do we trust in ourselves? Why do we add to God’s finished work? Might the answer include the word boast?”

Hence the title of the book It’s Not About Me.

“With life comes change.

With change comes fear, insecurity, sorrow, stress. So what do you do? Hibernate? Take no risks for fear of failing? Give no love for fear of losing? Some opt to. They hold back.

A better idea is to look up. Set your bearings on…God. For though life changes, he never does.”

~Max Lucado, It’s Not About Me

This dialogue in The Vampire Diaries caught my eye. I wanted to share. It’s about giving up and what I feel when faced with the impossible.

Stefan (vampire): “I’ve seen a lot of evil, Matt, more than you can imagine,” Stefan said. “I’ve even lived it. It’s always going to be a part of me, no matter how I fight it. Sometimes I think the whole human race is evil, much less my kind…I can’t tell you there’s a point or if things are ever going to turn out all right.” Stefan looked straight into Matt’s eyes and spoke deliberately. “But I’ve got another question for you. So what?”
Matt (human) stared. “So what?”
“Yeah, so what?”
“So what if the universe is evil and if nothing we do to try and change it can really make a difference?” Matt’s voice was gaining volume in disbelief.
“Yeah, so what?” Stefan leaned forward. “So what are you going to do, Matt, if every bad thing you’ve said is true? What are you going to do personally? Are you going to stop fighting and swim with the sharks?”
Matt was grasping the back of his chair. “What are you talking about?”
“You can do that, you know. Damon (evil vampire) says so all the time. You can join up with the evil side, the winning side. And nobody can really stop you, because the universe is that way, why shouldn’t we be that way too?”
“Like hell!” Matt exploded. His blue eyes were searing and he had half risen from his chair. “That’s Damon’s way, maybe! But just because it’s hopeless doesn’t mean it’s all right to stop fighting. Even if I knew it was hopeless, I’d still have to try. I have to try, damn it!”
“I know because I feel the same way,” Stefan continued. “There’s no excuse for giving up just because it looks like we’re going to lose. We have to try–because the other choice is surrender.”

I know, I know. I finished this study up months ago. The thing is – there’s an epilogue. Since it was such a great study I felt compelled to complete the whole book (this is not a common occurence). I’m glad I did because I found this:

Were there but some deep, holy spell, whereby
Always I should remember thee…
Lord, see thou to it, take thou remembrance’s load:
Only when I bethink me can I cry;
Remember thou, and prick me with love’s goad.
When I can no more stir my soul to move,
And life is but the ashes of the fire;
When I can but remember that my heart
Once used to live and love, long and aspire–
Oh, be thou then the first, the one thou art;
Be thou the calling, before all answering love,
And in me wake hope, fear, and boundless desire.
~George MacDonald, Diary of an Old Soul

Another tidbit from Uncommon:

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

~Mark Twain

I’m reading a book and I’m ten pages away from finishing – should I suck it up and read it? Or is life too short for me to read something I don’t enjoy?

Update: After posting this same question on feedback, six people encouraged me to finish the book. I did. Here’s my review on Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali:

“I would like to preface this review with this fact: I’m not a big non-fiction fan.
This is an autobiography that details Ayaan’s life from childhood to her current years in America … more ». I found the beginning part of the book easy to read and enjoyed learning about her home, Somalia. The part where she lost me, and why I’m only giving it three stars, is the Dutch political arena. This covered a good 1/3 of the end of the book. It was extremely difficult for me to enjoy and even follow. I suppose this is due to my lack of knowledge on Dutch politics.

Either way, I do appreciate her candid view on Islam. She speaks from first-hand experience and I appreciate her sobering reality of the situation. I believe these statements best summarize where she stands on the subject:

(p. 348-9) “My central, motivating concern is that women in Islam are oppressed. That oppression of women causes Muslim women and Muslim men, too, to lag behind the West. It creates a culture that generates more backwardness with every generation. It would be better for everyone–for Muslims, above all–if this situation could change.

When people say that the values of Islam are compassion, tolerance, and freedom, I look at reality, at real cultures and governments, and I see that it simply isn’t so. People in the West swallow this sort of thing because they have learned not to examine the religions or cultures of minorities too critically, for fear of being called racist.”

“Or can there be a more perfect pairing than the chocolate and peanut butter in the Tagalongs®?”*

The answer is no.

How do I know this? From the unfulfilled longing for this year’s Tagalongs®.  That’s right – unfulfilled. See this year, as part of my civic duty, I ordered some Girl Scout cookies. Two boxes of Thin Mints for Dave and a box of Tagalongs® for me. Well, the poor Girl Scout’s mom got confused when handing out the cookies and I wound up with a box of Do-Si-Dos®.** Do-Si Dos?® Really? Do you see chocolate with that peanut butter?

As you can imagine, I was outraged. Fortunately, my filter was on and I refrained from saying – “What the hell is the matter with you? A Do-Si-Do® IS NOT a Tagalong®!!”

So it goes without saying that I totally agree with Jen Lancaster. There is NOTHING that compares to a Tagalong®.

I suppose there’s always next year!

*Pretty in Plaid, page 39.
**What happened to kids actually taking the orders & handing out the cookies?!

The Way of the Heart by Henri J.M. Nowen was recommended in last week’s chapter of The Sacred Romance. Today I read this and thought I would share:

(The false self) Whether I am a pianist, a businessman or a minister, what matters is how I am perceived by the world. If being busy is a good thing, then I must by busy. If having money is a sign of real freedom, then I must claim my money…The compulsion manifests itself in the lurking fear of failing and the steady urge to prevent this by gathering more of the same — more work, more money, more friends.

These very compulsions are at the basis of the two main enemies of the spiritual life: anger and greed. They are the inner side of a secular life, the sour fruits of our worldly dependencies.